Blake Griffin Delays Practice Once Again To Prove He Can Still Dunk Over Kia Optima

Illustration for article titled Blake Griffin Delays Practice Once Again To Prove He Can Still Dunk Over Kia Optima

BROOKLYN, NY—Promising his increasingly bored teammates that he just needed another few attempts to get warmed up, center Blake Griffin delayed Nets practice once again Monday to prove he could still dunk over a Kia Optima. “Jesus Christ, he’s been at this for an hour—it’s getting hard to watch,” said shooting guard Landry Shamet, who lamented being stuck inside of the 2011 crossover, tossing lob passes to Griffen out of the sunroof. “We have a lot of new players on this team that need to get up to speed, so we really don’t have time for this. He keeps talking about how he needs to show that he’s still got it. We’re trying to be supportive, but it’s a little much to ask the coaching staff to pretend to be dunk contest judges. They’ve been holding up ‘10 signs’ for two hours now.” At press time, the Nets cancelled practice after three players were injured by Griffin’s attempt to dunk over them.