Lakers Confident They Just Need Another Once-In-A-Generation Player To Get Back On Track

LOS ANGELES—Despite his team’s dismal start to the NBA season, Los Angeles Lakers general manager Mitch Kupchak told reporters Wednesday that he believes the franchise only needs to add another once-in-a-generation player to get back on track. “I can certainly understand the pessimism among Lakers fans right now, but we’ll be able to right the ship if we can just find that one guy who will eventually rank among the best 20 NBA players of all time,” said Kupchak, adding that the team could easily return to championship contention if it simply drafts a 19-year-old phenom whose photo is printed on the cover of Sports Illustrated under the headline, “The Next Michael Jordan.” “The foundation is in place, and now it’s just a matter of adding a future first-ballot Hall of Famer who will put up 30,000 points over 20 years in the league and single-handedly take over games through unbelievable skill and athleticism, uncompromising competitiveness, and sheer willpower. If we can just get that missing piece, then we’ll be right back in the thick of things.” Reached for comment, Lakers shooting guard Kobe Bryant dismissed Kupchak’s claims, adamantly telling reporters that the roster already has a transcendent, generation-defining player at the peak of his powers.


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