NFL Braces For Record-Low Pro Bowl Player Attendance

PHOENIX—With league executives preparing themselves for the sight of half-empty sidelines on Saturday, sources confirmed Thursday that the NFL is quietly bracing for a record low in player attendance at this year’s Pro Bowl. “Based on our current data, we expect less than one quarter of players will show up to the University of Phoenix Stadium this weekend,” said NFL spokesman Greg Aiello, noting that the unnecessary risk of injury, lack of intensity, and overall meaninglessness of the game have contributed to the steady decline in the number of players who choose to come to the game each year. “We’ve made an effort to revamp the event in order to generate a higher rate of interest among Pro Bowlers, but it appears the majority will remain at home on Saturday. However, we’re still optimistic that coaching attendance will remain as high as in past years.” Aiello added that the NFL players who do show up will likely head for the exits once the game becomes a blowout in the third quarter.

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