LITTLE ELM, TX—With neither team having completed more than two hits during a rally before sending the ball back over the net, sources confirmed Wednesday that no one in Jefferson High School’s third-period gym class was willing to set during a volleyball game. “If the ball comes to me, I don’t care where I am on the court or who’s around me—I’m either spiking it or bumping it really high into the air,” said sophomore Elliot Wahl, echoing the sentiments of every one of his classmates, none of whom had set a single ball for a teammate at any point during the 45-minute game. “I basically just want to be right at the net so I can jump up and smash it as hard as I can. That’s all I want to do right now.” At press time, teams had rotated positions for the third consecutive time after another student attempted an acrobatic jump serve and slammed the ball directly into the net.
More from The Onion