ISLAND HARBOR, ANGUILLA—In an effort to cut down on the crippling costs of their $190 million roster, the New York Yankees avoided Major League Baseball’s luxury tax this week by moving the franchise to an offshore location. “The Yankees have called New York home for 115 years, but unfortunately, moving the staff and stadium to this Caribbean island is the only way to shield ourselves from the MLB’s punishing tax system and maintain acceptable levels of profitability,” said owner Hal Steinbrenner, adding that while he knows New Yorkers will be upset about the move, the minimal tax burden and lower wages of Anguilla were necessary to succeed in the highly competitive modern baseball environment. “Yankees fans will still be able to enjoy the team they love on nationally televised games or the YES Network, and all season ticket holders will be able to make the 1,600-mile journey by plane or boat for every game. Unless, of course, New York would be willing to give us $25 million in luxury tax breaks.” At press time, Boston Red Sox ownership was responding to the news by scouting potential stadium locations in Liechtenstein.

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